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Reader: I’m a college-educated 30-year-old manager running the most profitable department of our company, always professionally dressed and well-mannered, but I can’t seem to avoid being called “girl” at work. If I work off-site, the team there will ask if I’m “the new girl.” It’s not uncommon for the male owner to say, “Girls, have a good sales day” or for the female HR director to ask, “You girls have a nice weekend?”

If I try to play it off with good-natured humor (“I’m a grown-up now, but yes, I’m excited to be here!”) or more direct responses (saying “I’m not a ‘girl’ ” while making direct eye contact, then resuming normal conversation), I get cold-shouldered or worse. How do I drag my company into 2019 without compromising my job?

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