I was never keen on the National Lottery. On the night it launched, I nipped to the shop for cigarettes and was confronted with a queue which reached out of the door and off down the street. I was concerned the people had been hypnotized and summoned by the gaudy machine dispensing hope a pound at a time. I swore then, I would never buy a ticket and I haven't. And, when I see the new Lottery advertising gambit from Camelot, I'm glad.
The operator of the National Lottery has launched an online, singalong competition (those words alone are enough to send an icy chill down my spine). And yet it gets worse. The song to which people with too much time and too little dignity are encouraged to sing is a version of the Gilbert O'Sullivan hit, 'Ooh-Wakka-Doo-Wakka-Day'.
Now I have some time for Gilbert. His tune, 'Alone Again Naturally' is a real heartbreaking gem. But 'Ooh-Wakka-Doo-Wakka-Day' is less impressive. In fact, it's a bit annoying. So, I can only assume its inclusion in this campaign will raise its irritation value to previously unknown heights.
Anyway, the first spot breaks during ITV's 'The X-Factor' on Saturday. It was created by Abbot Mead Vickers BBDO, and the campaign shows more than 300 people, including office folk, construction workers, fishermen and rugby players. But they're not constructing, fishing, playing rugby or office working. They're singing ‘Ooh-Wakka-Doo-Wakka-Day in locations purporting to display authentic places in UK life. Places where, presumably, people have put their precious occupations on hold in order to relate a long-forgotten pop song from 1972. Only with new lyrics. Oh yes, just to ensure the entire exercise is completely toe-curling, they've chucked in some new words.
All this is an effort to relaunch the National Lottery’s Lotto game (which I'm sure has been relaunched before, so this would be a re-relaunch). Apparently, they're adding new levels and doubling prize fund. Oh and it's now £2.00 to play. Again, my decision to opt out still seems like a good one.
Inevitably, the community singing competition is happening on YouTube. On The National Lottery's own YouTube channel to be precise. It's there we're all invited to upload videos of ourselves signing the song, and - get this - you can make up your own lyrics.
Even though the winning entry will bag £20,000, I urge you, for the good of all humankind, not to do this. Any of it. It all just too ghastly and I'm sure has been designed to bring shame and humiliation on out grandchildren in the distant future.
Sally Cowdry is the consumer and marketing director of Camelot, and this is what she told The Drum magazine:
"The new campaign we’ve unveiled is epic in its scale and ambition – this is the biggest thing we’ve done since The National Lottery launched in 1994 and is a truly innovative, exciting and ground-breaking campaign for us.
"We want to reach every corner of the nation, every Lotto player across the UK – and even the small number of adults out there who’ve never played. We want everyone to sing our song and understand the great prizes new Lotto has to offer."
Sally, Sally, Sally. No.
Magnus Shaw is a writer, blogger and broadcaster
