Today we are half way through the worst month of the year - hooray! And how are we doing, people? How's your Dry January going? And your new fitness routine? How about those New Year Resolutions? If the doom and gloom, incessant rain and the next Bank Holiday being a long long way off isn't enough to get you down the self-imposed guilt that January brings sure will.
The truth is you are never going to feel more guilty about your health/finances/achievements/relationships as you do in January, January is supposedly the month in which we get a clean slate, magically reinvent ourself and emerge into 2014 healthier, happier, more-focused and thin. The truth of it is we put far too much pressure on ourselves and can never live up to our New Year expectations.
Nike have launched - a product which adds that extra pang of guilt to your daily routine
You may have already heard of the FuelBand that our friends over at Nike have launched - a product which adds that extra pang of guilt to your daily routine and this comes in the form of a bracelet which measures your levels of activity for athletes and couch potatoes alike. The man who served me in the bank yesterday had one of these on which puzzled me somewhat. Perhaps he just can't live without knowing how many steps around the branch he has taken in any one day.
In perfect timing with the New Year New You - Nike have just launched a limited edition FuelBand in silver as part of the SE Metaluxe collection. You wear this bracelet 24/7 and it tots up how many 'FuelPoints' you have earned, nudges you if you are inactive for 30 minutes and measures your sleep. It sends all this information back to an app which you can compare with your other friends using it.
Spending £139 on what is essentially an ever-present nagging personal trainer is somewhat beyond me. Who wants to be 'nudged' in the middle of the cinema? Who want's a device that tells all your friends you stayed in bed for 15 hours? Who gives a crap about 'FuelPoints' anyhow? It sounds like something a Shell garage cashier may ask you if you are collecting.
Who gives a crap about 'FuelPoints' anyhow?
If you are being a lazy arse you know so, you don't need a fancy bracelet to keep reminding you. At the end of the day we are all human beings who have good days and bad days and we should listen and adjust our activity depending on what our bodies are telling us, not according to what the robot on our wrist says.
Nike have cashed in rather well on our self-obsessive guilt and wearing such a bracelet is obviously becoming a bit of a fashion statement in it's own right. Did I point out it is also a watch? I think I will just carry on wearing my watch, it's much less judgemental and go and have a packet of crisps and a nap thanks.
