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Say what? 15 ridiculous things overheard in agencies

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Here's a little plug for a Twitter feed we can all enjoy. Called @AgencyQuotes, it simply compiles strange, amusing and ridiculous things which have been uttered in the offices of creative businesses throughout the land. Highly entertaining and somewhat addictive, I'd suggest you spend at least a couple lunch-breaks absorbing their stuff, and even contributing to the collection.

There's something peculiar about creative endeavours, which seems to give rise to the eyebrow-raising quote. Of course, this may be true of all industries. It's possible that accounting, law and manufacturing throw up just as many daft phrases, but instinct tells me they don't. Having worked in media and advertising for almost a quarter of a century, I can confirm the alarming, bizarre and utterly crazy saying thrives in the creative sector. Here's a few of my favourites, all of which I heard or overheard with my own two ears:

"I'd like a raffle ticket, but I'd rather not pay."
(An Account Handler during an office charity drive)

"The client thought your headline 'Who Dares Wins' was borrowed from somewhere, but I assured him it was completely original."
(An Account Manager, returning from a presentation)

"I love your ironic Motorhead t-shirt."
(Very metropolitan Studio Assistant to an Art Director and massive Motorhead fan)

"Whenever I hear the word 'creativity' I just shut down."
(Senior Board Director to Creative Director)   

"Computers? They're the coming thing, aren't they?"
(Department Manager in a meeting with a global IT company)

"I've been told the internet will be full within a year."
(Client in a discussion about website improvements)

"I told the client we'd do the copy for free, as writing is dead easy."
(Account Executive, briefing in a brochure project)

"I wish we could just send the client an invoice without going through all this creative nonsense."
(New Business Manager in a budget meeting)

"I don't think you'll be able to help. I need to speak to a creative."
(Manager to a Copywriter)

"And you draw the pictures, do you?"
(Client to an Art Director, while being shown around an agency)

"This job is too important to be booked into traffic."
(Account Executive to the traffic manager)

"I'll write you a brief when you've completed the work."
(Client to a freelance copywriter)

"I want the best people on this. But I'll settle for your team."
(Account Director to Creative Lead)

"I want the copy length substantially reduced. I've also attached a lot of new information that needs adding."
(Client to Senior Copywriter)

"Don't use any apostrophes. I hate apostrophes."
(Client to Head Of Copy)
 

 

Magnus Shaw is a blogger and copywriter

Photo Credits: Caroline Williamson

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